Arrivals and Departures- or another day at the office?

As stated before, life is a series of arrivals and departures. People come and people go but the ones that stay, the ones that truly matter, are the constant in a world of in's and out's. Traveling from airport to airport we see it all; tears of goodbye's and tears of hello's. The airport can be such an emotional gateway, reuniting and tearing people apart. Diving right into it, we don't know. What does that fragment mean? We don't know, I don't know. It starts with you! I don't know what you just endured whether it be personally or operationally. You might have just said goodbye to your true love or might be departing for a funeral. You might have just had another flight cancelled and missed your sister's wedding. I don't know you, but what I do know is that with every departure there is an arrival. Every end there is a beginning. When you leave someone- someone else, whether it be instant or eventually, will be there on the other side. Bereavement travel is comparable. Boarding that flight is like the beginning of an end, but with the boarding comes an arrival. A reuniting of family, friends, and loved ones. As cabin crew we can get carried away with how we are treated or how we come across. But we just don't know. A lot of us don't realize that emotional roller coaster that can come with airports and we take it for granted that what might be the hardest thing for you, is just another day at the office for us. We do care, we really do! Sometimes it just takes a moment of goodbyes for ourselves personally to realize it. So with every departure and every arrival, if we treat it like an end and a beginning we can regain that empathy and sympathy that a lot of people want. Just a simple and sincere "how are you" does more than you'll ever know. It doesn't matter if your in 13F or in the jump seat. We are all human.

From the Slam-clicker to the Jumpseat Confessional-the parallels of actions and personalities.

Which are you?

Honestly I have to say there are two factors that determine if I will be a slam-clicker or a jumpseat confessional. First, the crew. If I’m working with senior FA’s who are calloused and crusty from the industry it’s clearly going to be a slam clicker kind of time.  If I have a more junior crew or I see the name of ‘that’ FA on my roster you know good times are going to be had.

A little bit of history on the slam-clicker vs. the jumpseat confessional. Have you ever been in the galley minding your own cart and the green wants nothing more than to tell you about the problems her and her boyfriend are going through? Remember you have only met this person THIS MORNING and she’s already telling you that his libido is a bit too much for her.  Have you ever been in the galley trying to mind your own cart but someone else is telling you your sugar is in the wrong spot? They openly pride themselves on being a FAM(flight attendant manual) licker? These two scenarios describe the jumpseat confessional and the slam clicker.

The jumpseat confessional. What drives one person to be able to meet someone and spill their darkest secrets in a matter of 2 flights? We’ve all done it at one point in time. Is it the factor that there’s an 80% chance you will never see this person again in your life and they provide an arbitrary point of view? Is it the 10% chance they have a story that can relate and a new friendship is formed? Or do you just want someone to bitch to? Who knows? As a passenger you can’t begin to comprehend once that curtain is shut what conversations take place in that galley.  One the jumpseat is flipped down and cruising altitude is reached, the skies the limit as far as conversation goes.  It becomes our own confessional booth. Some take the bait some don’t. Most of the time the ones that don’t fall into what we call the slam- clicker.

The slam clicker- hops out of van. Signs name on sign in sheet. Grabs room key. Takes elevator-not holding it for anyone. Exits elevator with no salutation. Opens door. Slams door. Clicks lock. R.I.P until check-in. What drives one person to be able to close themselves off from their coworkers-from the people they are trusting their daily lives with? We’ve all done it at one point in time. Is it the fact that you’re spending upwards of 14 hours a day with these people and once you are off the clock wan nothing to do with them? Probably. But I think that most of these instances where you encounter a slam-clicker are based upon personality. Introverted. Independent. They possess the ability to separate their work from their life on their pairing. If you can do this, tell me how. When I start a pairing, its one crew concept from check in on day 1 to check out on day 5.  Invites to dinner are extended, walks on the trails or even a java run for those early risers! Why separate what you are given for 5 days?  As a passenger, you cant being to comprehend once that uniform is off what can happen.  Crews and pairings are made and broke once that scarf is off.

I digress. I realize I’ve just summed up thousand and thousands of crews into two types of personalities, which isn’t very realistic or logical, but I know for the crews reading this its pretty damn close to true.  These past blog posts have been wordy and deep. I’ll change it up. I’ve been inspired with a fun to-do for my next blog. Until then I’ll leave you with the oldest one in the book.

She walks into the flight deck and asks, “Captain, coffee tea or me?”

Captain responds with “whatever is easier to make”

Words of Wisdom to Flights of Passion-the art of flying and the balance of a relationship.

Somebody once told me something along the lines of this...

No matter the place you fly; No matter how familiar Toronto, Vancouver, Los Angeles or New York become, to always keep writing. Remember every place you go, but with every arrival and every departure, treat the day as though you have never been there before.  Remember where your home is, its where romance lies also. This way- every day will be a new adventure and we'll never run out of romance.

It's true. As Candice Bergen, in the movie View from the Top, once said "Every Captain needs a Co-Captain" I can't do this journey alone. What is going from coast to coast any good if I have no one to share it with? She also said that life is a series of arrivals and departures. People are going to come and go. Aircrafts will come and go, passengers and crews. They all come and go. But my co-pilot is my constant. Keeps me grounded when things are bad, and let's me stretch my wings when they are good. As stated before, no matter what city becomes and feels like home, my co-pilot reminds me where my heart lies.

It's not easy trying to grow in a relationship when all you answer to are two powerful forces. Crew Sked and Mother Nature. Time is valuable. It allows you to grow, bond and strengthen in many ways. Sitting on the edge of your seat just waiting for that phone to ring and tell you where your off to is not comfortable for anyone. Then why do I do it? Why would I test my relationship, my emotions and my psychological strength like this? Is it the unpredictability? Is the game of "where am I ACTUALLY going to sleep tonight?"I don't know. But I'm sure that I'll realize it soon.

The same question can be asked of why do people fly? Is it the true need to get from A to B? Is it the glamour of being forced in a tube 41000 ft in the air sipping champagne watching a rerun of Entourage? Times have changed. The glamour has faded away and what's left? Flip flops, lu lu lemon sweatpants and iPods. These things have replaced dressing up for flights, conversation with other passengers and an era that will forever be remembered to flight attendants.

But, if I'm treating every day like its my first, and every destination like it's unexplored then I have a different type of glamour, personal glamour for a job that is underestimated. Remember your first flight? The sounds that scared you out of your mind. The way you saw the cabin crew flow through the cabin effortlessly satisfying a bombardment of tasks?  This is where it changes. Today, I thought, I don't know if this is the lady in 13C first flight. Same goes for the business man in 2A. You never know. So why would I rob one passenger of a quality of service that I see given in first class? This is my vow. To try to reinstate the art of flying, the glamour, one passenger at a time one flight at a time. Who knows. We may just start seeing more ties and dresses and less flip flops and lulu's.

Simple. It's so much more.

These thoughts, and posts will change from time to time. Some will fly deep, some will fly funny. The blog in general, will remain simple. Hopefully this will let the words take off and the thoughts flow.

Flight Attendants. Who are they? They are doctors, nurses, firefighters, chefs, servers, parents and mediators in the sky. They are the faces of their airlines and the personalities and reflections of corporate culture from one coast to the next.

And this. What is this? Yes, it is yet another blog from a flight attendant, but it is also the constant in a ever-changing mind. This will always be here. Words and thoughts. That won't change, but everything else does. We need a constant in our lives to keep us grounded and to keep us sane because nothing else around us stays the same. We come and we go, our flights come and go, and our passengers come and go. Hopefully you will find relation, humor or whatever you need to from this to remind yourself why you do what you do and what it is that keeps your engines roaring.